My PaLaCe

Sentosa

2010-06-13T21:20:00.014+08:00

2010-06-13T19:06:00.004+08:00

2010-04-25T20:36:00.035+08:00

Hong Kong

2010-04-25T19:24:00.032+08:00

Welcome to Taiwan!!!

2009-11-01T21:10:00.013+08:00

Arab Street

2009-10-16T10:18:00.024+08:00

Portsdown Road

2009-10-16T09:33:00.028+08:00

2009-09-21T22:33:00.012+08:00

Redang Part 2

2009-07-19T21:46:00.035+08:00

Redang part 1

2009-07-19T19:18:00.002+08:00

Underwater photos in Redang

2009-07-18T20:31:00.015+08:00

2009-06-13T11:21:00.001+08:00

2009-03-17T21:44:00.004+08:00

2009-02-24T21:38:00.010+08:00

Barry's birthday

2009-01-04T00:59:00.007+08:00

2008-12-25T21:58:00.005+08:00

2008-10-06T21:45:00.010+08:00

2008-08-31T00:42:00.003+08:00

2008-07-11T23:09:00.004+08:00

2007-12-12T23:09:00.000+08:00

2007-10-07T22:19:00.000+08:00

2007-10-07T21:35:00.000+08:00

2007-08-19T19:06:00.000+08:00

2007-08-03T23:41:00.000+08:00

2007-07-23T00:11:00.000+08:00

i've just moved my blogsite. pls do change the links. all histories are also transfered to wordpress. this is due to the increased privacy. for more updates please

click here.

Love story...

2007-07-06T17:39:00.000+08:00

As we know love is something that we cannot control,
that's why we are always creating merchandise
so that we can be hopeful and would pursue love...

,..,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.

We walk along this endless road,
We sat by the tree and had a chat,
The leaves have waited so long that it has turned yellow.

As the evening approach,
The mosquitoes increase in numbers,
But we refuse to leave.

A gust of wind blew pass us,
Blew away the irritating mosquitoes,
And blew to me the scent of her hair.
But we refuse to leave.

Now, even the moon had come to wave to us.

,..,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.

You had very easily threw the love i've given to you,
I'm so upset.
I told you,
This time we are through.

How can you be so stubborn,
To ignore how i feel,
This time we are through.

If you really want to be with me,
You would need to apologise.
And return the love that i longed for.
if not...
I think we are really through.

,..,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.

While i'm still young,
I can give you my love without reservation.
While i'm still innocent,
I can give you all of me.
While i'm still naive,
I can still believe that loving you is for a lifetime.

Please love my youth, love my willfulness, love my persistence,
before we learn to plan for the future,
just allow us to love without boundaries.

,..,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.

As i walk further into the lake,
The water is a little cold.

But i want to be able to think clearly,
Things that i'm not so sure of.
I'm not sure if the issues in my heart
Are really so unclear,
Or is it because i am unclear of myself,
That cause all of these uncertainties.

If it is because of my own uncertainties,
That cause all these problem,
Then how should i comfirm these uncertainties?
If it is because of other's uncertainies,
Then how change the uncertainities to certainities?

The water is so cold
That it makes me shiver,
I'm almost breathless.

And now i can only be certain about something,
that i'm want to be ashore again...

,..,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.

At this point that i am at, where things are just so clear to me just scares me. i lay my expectations even higher than me, that i no longer can have that purest of love, where i can just abandon everything i just love anymore. i would think about the consequence, i would think about the future. i would think about so many things. when things are in this way... i dont think i'm able to make the right-est decision when everything is so unclear. and things are confusing me, like wires being entangled together and they are strangling me, leaving me out of breath. there should be time where i should sit down and sort them out one by one. or at least be sure of what is going on...

Smoking

2007-07-06T15:08:00.000+08:00

i seriously do not understand who do people smoke. let's just put aside of the harm that smoking would bring to themselves, cos i think we can't really control how others think of their own lives. trying to poison themselves for gradually suicidal. first and formost are they should be concern about their love ones. as a smoker he/she should know how harmful these smoke are to a passive smoker. the harm would Depend on the amount of exposure to tobacco smoke, they may suffer from irritation to the eyes, runny nose, sore throat and headache. which i think i'm so sensitive to be.

for me being in a Club that is smoke infested, it would probaly take me a maximum of 30 mins to get tears in my eyes, runny nose. and the side effects fot he next day is to have sore throat and a super bad headache. amazing how sensive i am is to smoke when my dad smokes? tt's because even before the can lit up a cigaratte i would be 10 miles away from him.

for i say... smokers can risk own life in smoking in tar, carbon monoxide, eating some road tar, cans of pesticides and mothballs, drinking floor cleaner and paint DO NOT have the right to try to posion the people around them. be it if they are passerbys, friends or even their loveones. it is just imposing a virus into their systems hoping that they would get a higher chance of developing lung cancer, heart attack and lung infection, severe attacks in people with asthma, bronchitis, colds and allergies, and heart disease.

some may say... "tt's why we smokers are smart, at least we smoke we have the filter to save our ass" THE?! what a dumb way to put things. the point is that Cigarette filters may trap part of the tar and nicotine but they do not remove any poisons from the smoke. oh ya... by the way smokers are also 2nd hand smokers. -_-" so u r taking it in anyway!

what do this actually pose to say abt these group of people? Selfish? Not thinking right? easily being influence? whatever it might be.

3 main things u would lose...

1) Health(they probably would be bothered about this)
2) Finance (they would probably even use their last cents they have to smoke)
3) Your Love (as a passive smoker they would probably die be4 u, and sorry to say u would need stay LONELY and MISERABLE for the rest of ur life)

Leaf's departure is because of Wind's pursuit. Or because Tree didn'task her to stay...

2007-06-30T16:18:00.000+08:00

Some may have heard of this story. Some mayb have heard me teling this story before. but this has been on of my favourite ones... It's about 3 person: the Tree, the Leaf and the Wind...

Leaf's departure is because of Wind's pursuit. Or because Tree didn'task her to stay......

Tree
_____________

People call me "Tree".

I had dated 5 girls when I was in Pre-U. There is one girl who I love alot but never dared to go after. She didn't have a pretty face, good figure or an outstanding charm. She was just a very ordinary girl. I liked her. I really liked her. I liked her innocence, her frankness, her intelligence and her fragility. Reason for not going after her was thatI felt somebody so ordinary like her was not a good match for me. I wasalso afraid that after we were together all the feelings would vanish. I was also afraid other's gossip would hurt her.

I felt that if she were my girl, she'd be mine ultimately & I didn't have to give up everything just for her. The last reason, made her accompanying me for 3 years. She watched me chase other girls, and I have made her heart cry for 3 years. She was a good actor, and me a demanding director. When I kissed my second girlfriend, she bumped into us. She was embarrassed but smiled & said, "Go on!" before running off.The next day, her eyes were swollen like a walnut. I did not want to know what caused her to cry. Later that day, I returned from soccer training to get something & watched her cry in the classroom for an hour or so. My fourth girlfriend did not like her.There was once when both of them quarreled. I know that based on her character she is not the type that will start the quarrel. However, I still sided my girlfriend. I shouted at her & ignored her feelings and walked off with my girlfriend. The next day, she was laughing & joking with me like nothing happened. I know she was hurt but she did not know deep down inside I was hurt too.

When I broke up with my fifth girlfriend, I asked her out. Later that day, I told her I had something to tell her. I told her about my breakup. Coincidentally, she has something to tell me too, about her getting together. I knew who the person was. His pursuit for her had been the talk of the School. I did not show her my heartache, just smiles & best wishes. Once I reached home, I could not breathe. Tears rolled & I broke down. How many times have I seen her cry for the man who did not acknowledge her presence?

During graduation, I read a SMS in my hp. It said, "Leaf's departure isbecause of Wind's pursuit. Or because Tree didn't ask her to stay"

Leaf
_______________

People call me Leaf.

During the 3 years of Pre-U, I was on very close terms with a guy as buddy kind. However, when he had his first girlfriend, I learnt afeeling I never should have learnt - Jealousy. Sourness to the extreme limit. They were only together for 2 months. When they broke up, I hid my happiness. But after a month, he got together with another girl.

I liked him & I know he liked me. But why won't he pursue me? Since he loves me why he didn't he make the first move? Whenever he had a new girlfriend, my heart would hurt. After some time, I began to suspect that this was one-sided love. If he didn't like me, why did he treat me so well? It's beyond what you will normally do for a friend. I know his likes, his habits.But his feelings towards me I can never figure out. You can't expect mea girl, to ask him. Despite that, I still wanted to be by his side. Care for him, accompany him, and love him. Hoping that one day, he will come to love me. Because of this, I waited for him. Sometimes, I wondered if I should continue waiting. The pain, the dilemma accompanied me for 3 years.

At the end of my 3rd year, a junior pursues me. Everyday he pursues me. He's like the cool & gentle wind, trying to blow off a leaf from a tree. In the end, I realized that I wanted to give this wind a small footing in my heart. I know the wind will bring the leaf to a better land. Finally, leaf left the tree, but the tree only smiled & didn't ask me to stay.

Leaf's departure is because of Wind's pursuit. Or cause Tree didn't ask her to stay.

Wind
________________

Because I like a girl called leaf. Because she's so dependent on tree, so I have to be a gust wind. A wind that will blow her away. When I first met her, it was 1 month after I was transferred to this new school. I saw a petite person looking at my seniors & me playing soccer. During ECA time, she will always be sitting there. Be it alone or with her friends, looking at him. When he talks with girls, there's jealousy in her eyes. When he looked at her, there's a smile in her eyes. Looking at her became my habit. Just like, she likes to look at him.

One day, she didn't appear. I felt something missing. I can't explain the feeling except it's a kind of uneasiness. The senior was also not there as well. I went to their classroom, hid outside and saw my senior scolding her. Tears were in her eyes while he left. The next day, I saw her at her usual place, looking at him. I walked over and smiled to her. Took out a note & gave to her. She was surprised. She looked at me, smiled & accepts the note. The next day, she appeared & passes me a note and left.

It read, "Leaf's heart is too heavy and wind couldn't blow her away."

"It's not that leaf heart is too heavy. It because leaf never want to leave tree." I replied her note with this statement and slowly she started to talk to me & accept my presents & phone calls. I know that the person she loves is not me. But I have this perseverance that one day I will make her like me. Within 4 months, I have declared my love for her no less than 20 times. Every time, she will divert away from the topic. But I never give up. If I decide I want her to be mine, I will definitely use all means to win her over. I can't remember how many times I have declared my love to her. Although I know, she will try to divert but I still bear a small ray of hope.

Hoping that she will agree to be my girlfriend. I didn't hear any reply from her over the phone. I asked, "What are you doing? How come you didn't want to reply?" She said, "I'm nodding my head". "Ah?" I couldn't believe my ears. "I'm nodding my head" She replied loudly. I hang up the phone, quickly changed and took a taxi and rush to her place & press her doorbell. During the moment when she opens the door, I hugged her tightly.

Leaf departure is because of Wind pursuit. Or because Tree didn't ask her to stay...

Moral
_____________________

In love, we win very rarely, but when love is true, even if you lose, you still win just for having the tingle of loving someone more than you love yourself. There comes a time when we stop loving someone, not because that person has stopped loving us but because we have found out that, they'd be happier if we let go....

Why do we close our eyes when we sleep? When we cry? When we imagine? When we kiss? This is because THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THINGS IN THE WORLD ARE UNSEEN.

There are things that we never want to let go of, people we never want to leave behind, but keep in mind that letting go isn't the end of the world.
It's the beginning of a new life. Happiness lies for those who cry those who hurt, those who have searched and those who have tried. For only they can appreciate the importance of the people who have touched our
lives.

A great love? It's when you shed tears and still you care for them, it's when they ignore you and still you long for them. It's when they begin to love another and yet you smile and say, "I'm happy for you." If love fails, set yourself free, let your heart spread its wings and fly again. Remember you may find love and lose it, but when love dies, you never have to die with it.

The strongest people are not those who always win but those who stand back up when they fall. Somehow, along the course of life, you learn about yourself and realize that there should never be regrets, only a lifelong appreciation of the choices you've made. Loving is not how you forget but how you forgive, not how you listen but how you understand, not what you see but how you feel, and not how you let go but how you hold on.

It's more dangerous to weep inwardly rather than outwardly. Outward tears can be wiped away while secret tears scar forever...

It's best to wait for the one you want than settle for one that's available. It's best to wait for the right one because life is too short to waste on just someone.

expectations...

2007-06-30T15:46:00.000+08:00

to be able to be disappointed by someone, 1st u have to set an expectation. if there is no expectation then... probably there wouoldn't be any disappointment, or should i say... the disappointment wouldn't be that great. expections are still expectations. would could be sure that the expectations that u have for someone is what the person can and want to give. i feel it's very difficult to define. like for me, i have my own kind of expectations for my partner. and sometimes it may sound illogical but this is the upsetting fact of what it is about.

for example to be treated like a princess, who do not want to be treated that way? everyone would hope to be adored and loved not only by the person whom she love, but also the people around her. and at least the very basic understand and respect from her partner's friends. i believe that dirty linen should be kept at home. when it comes to upsetting incidents. bitching is permitted but probably the actual identity or fine details should be left out. this could prevent any misunderstandings or akward situtations.

the other point is the person would have to be able to take all my nonsense. i do admit i can sometimes be a wierd person whom like to do unexplainable things. what's more it's my child-like thinking. to say... sometimes my mummy can't even stand this part of me. i would blow her off her top and i'll give her the "puss- in- boots" look. and she just have to give up and smile.

in reality there are many thing that i really scary and many may choose to avoid or not to choose. sometimes it's just too hard of a choice to make. and others... u r just too afraid of losing... but no one is to be blamed...

bikini!

2007-06-27T01:13:00.000+08:00

yippie yeah! tomorrow going swimming. aiming for a new bikini. super duper gorgous!

as u can see... haha. nice tan with nice bikini. so pretty! actually saw another black lacy bikini at TopShop just now. it's under the Kate Moss collection. nice and pretty. but not as much as this. this is really nice. when i get a job. get my 1st pay. I'LL DEFINATELY GET IT!!!

ending of one route and the start of another...

2007-06-25T23:14:00.000+08:00

my results has been out for quite sometime. a lil upset for quite sometime. cos i was aiming for a Degree in Distinction. i'm just a few points away from my distinction. i seriously mean a few points. like 2 points?! WTF! i think it is due to my sem. cos something bad happened at that period of time. and there goes my DISTINCTION!!!

what's to be comforting is that i pass my Strategic Management. and even got a credit! YEAH! tt means i must have gotten a distinction for my exams. but too bad... i failed my project. tt is the FIRST time i failed a test, exam or project. it is truely shocking for me. and VERY upsetting and fustrating!!! but i'm still glad i made it through.

oh well... now that it over. at least i made it through my schooling days without a flaws. once again i wanna thanks all my friends for seeing me all the way through till now...

determined

2007-06-23T15:13:00.000+08:00

this time i'm no longer listen to anyone's advice. be it. if it is from the ppl whom care for me the most like Rick, Ning, JT. i'm going to go by what my heart thinks. i know some maybe not approve of what i do. i do appreciate what u guys have done. but this time i'm going to be determined. at least this week would be a test for me. no one need to know about the process but the unltimate outcome. for now, i'm certain what i want to do. to pursue what my heart tell me. but not what i hear. cos to me now... logic doesn't make sense to me anymore. in fact i feel the logic overpowered. to say in the 1st place love isn't even a logical factor. i should make use more of my right brain. if it takes me to wait i would. if the rain comes that would be even better, cos maybe i would be able to dance in the rain again.

my mummy knows what's going on, but i know she's not saying anything cos she wants me to feel better. dont think i would want to stay at home so often anymore. cos i know if she would to see the tears she would be worried. she knows i'm a strong girl, and i'll be fine.

if i had a chance

2007-06-23T01:28:00.000+08:00

i dont understand why i can't why is it till now i still can't forgive myself. i know what's going on, and i know he has forgave me but why just i put down my own conscience? i dont even know why did i just let him leave just like that. from the start i know i was wrong. now i'm feeling so stranded. it is like as if i want to reach out to his hands and yet he is so far away. and somehow he just disappear. maybe because i didn;t make him stay for me. but if i had a choice i would grab his hands again. but he wouldnt be there again. i would need my courage back to stand on my feet and run. but i just no strength. if i had a chance... i would...

if u do read this pls also listen to this song...

i'm no longer HIS lil bunny...

2007-06-22T15:52:00.000+08:00

i wonder if the rain is crying for me. i thought that this wouldn't be so painful. but ever have i thought that this would be even more painful than ever. i used to blame you for you were never there and now that i realized that maybe i enjoy being with me. yes it is being alone. what have i been experiencing these 2 weeks. at times i walk on the street crying inside asking why i am alone walking on such busting street. what i see all around be are people laughing, smile, chatting, hugging, kissing and holding hands. i've been walking around S'pore River so often recently. and got my legs all blistered. and not feeling that much pain as compared to the hurt within. i really want to hold on to what i have now. but i'm really loosing grip. and i dont blame anyone. even the one who have decided to leave. or should i say... have left. the problem have been fighting within me. which way to go.

i remember the night when there was a such heavy downpour. you were sleeping in the car. and i just jumped out of the car and started dancing in the rain. i thought that it was so beautiful. cos i had never left so relaxed. i didnt mind who was looking. i wish i can do that again. just once more. just let it rain so that no one could see my tears.

i so enjoyed the times. but i guess i've never thought that this would happen.

Dao Dai

2007-06-20T23:27:00.000+08:00

when i say life is complicated. i guess it can never get more complicated than this. i'm just caught in the middle. actually all that happen was no one to blame except me. probably it is due to me not understand what i want or need. i think this would be the song that discribe how i feel at this point

confused.

2007-06-09T23:44:00.000+08:00

how would u know if the person u r with is the person u need.
or who is it u can't live without. at this point i'm really confused.

i dont know what to do.

2 different world

2007-06-09T01:14:00.000+08:00

when a couple are together, is it important that they are somewhere or somehow alike? at the beginning i thought that that isn't imporant. but when it comes to maintaining a relationship, it can get fustrating at times. two very different lifestyles. two very different thinking. when too much of commodating might just make things turn sour. a solution...? i dont have it anways...

2007-06-06T10:46:00.000+08:00

been going for many interviews. almost every other day. and it is getting kinda fustrating. it is the 1st interview, the 2nd interview, then realize you dont like the job scope. reject the job. and the whole process start all over again.

Pictures

2007-06-04T23:38:00.000+08:00

and tt's Ning new toy. his name... Gingie or something like tt.

so... this is one of the cutiest guy currently. his name... Jun Bin. but i call him "Mr. Stranger"

Me and Juay Tee. one of the dino hopefully!

My Mummy!!!

2007-04-26T00:29:00.000+08:00

mummy stop slouching and smile alright? it's just one photo... pretty pls...!!!

mummy just left for Vietnam wif dad. feeling a lil upset. mummy left, and no one would listen to my nonsense. in the family only my mum can take all my whining and "cold jokes" alright my mum's jokes are sometimes kills a thousand time more than mine. AUGH! how can i ever live without my mummy. she is the BEST BEST MUMMY in the world.

she would always stock up EXTRA food for me when i'm having my exams. and would cook all the wierd cooling drinkings for me. (tt's b'cos i have the tendency to be sick nearing the exams) in the morning my mummy would always prepare me breakfast. so tt i wouldnt go hungry when i'm school. and of cos... when i'm feeling a little LOONY, my mummy would always sit there and listen to my loony-ness. (while playing her computer game) although she MIGHT not be listening... but tt's good enough! hehe. AND AND AND... just recently Val and Prisc bought me this huge Marie for my birthday, i would sometimes talk to her (in tt "meow meow" tone of course!!!) and my mummy would give me THAT look, and smile. and call me a "da meow meow" HAHA!!! YES!!! she did!!! now u know where my WONDERFUL genes came from. i know even if the whole world abandon me... i still have my super woman with me!!! ok... i need to wash the laundry now, cos my superwoman ain't at home.

ok now... some picutres to enjoy!

my greeny toned nail with Lingz greeny pencil. this nail polish has such beautiful glitters. anyways it was commented that i look like "xiao qin" from "Bai Se Zuan" aka "Md White Snake"

ok.... so i'm very determined... i tried anther colour which i think it's sooo... PRETTY! PINKIE! btw tt's a nice cute pink Marie pen. newly bought to motivate me to finish my notes. at the background, tt's my notes! i think i finish more than a quarter of my newly bought stack of paper.

my loony friend and me! Ning. she got a new name for a "chou chou" again. tt's her boster anyways. just so alike. we like to name would property with wierd cutie cutie names. ohh... this was taken when we went K a few weeks back.

once upon a time

2007-04-16T23:46:00.000+08:00

long long time ago when i had my long hair. would leave it long now, to match my tutu. hehe. ballet classes.

the bimbo talk- love or hate? can't make up my mind...

2007-04-14T23:32:00.000+08:00

sometimes you would feel urself just right out of place. and tt's what i am feeling now. sometimes... i just dont understand why some people have some kind of wierd mentaliy. like... "NO! SHE WILL STEAL MY FRIEND..." oh my goddness! if she's ur friend then she would be ur friend forever, no matter how she get "snatched" by another person would be non- existance. and pls we are no longer in primary school playing those "i friend u, i dont friend u" game.

okok. i'm feeling out of place due to the "i am afraid tt u would..." thinking. heyhey. now tt no one is around YOU are out my circle of love. shoo shoo. go away. u r NOT wanted here.

me not being wanted?! tt's just too bad for me! sorry Geraldine. pls go find ur "OWN FRIEND" it's alright... i'll live just fine. this is so sucky. but nvm. i'm flexible enough to make u feel good about urself and OF COS MYSELF.

a clear love n hate line. no in between. dont be too contradicting.

it's my fault

2007-04-13T00:59:00.000+08:00

as time passes lesser words are spoken
is it because to leave things unsaid?
is it because i dont have to say it n yet u understand?
or is it because there's nothing left to be said?

while i press a pause to everything
and take a look back at the past
i realized though this time
we have both lost and gained some stuffs
like how we hang out together till the dusk fall
like how we sit under the twinkling stars
like how we ran away from reality n do what we feel like

coming back to reality...
what we've lost is what we've gain
squabbles
tears
and...
distance

maybe i should have never known
the word called 'reciprocate'
i've done this wrong again...

i want to learn Ballet

2007-04-07T00:41:00.000+08:00

since young i've always dreamt of dancing, especially ballet. i feel that it is the most graceful dance. and would give a girl a very good posture. oh well... as good as my life is being controlled by my parents. i wasn't able to take it up. i remember when i was in primary school. i would be expected to learn things that my parents like? for example... Violin. it's not that i hate to play the violin. just that i prefer drawing and dancing. and somehow because i parents portray that it is useless. i was forced to quit my cartoon drawing class, not learn ballet. and carry on with my violin class. being that violin wasn't my 1st choice class to go to. to be able to get a grade 7 certificate is considered amazing. but i really really prefer spending my time drawing and dance. and now i've in my last sem of school. and going to work soon (gosh! i wish i didn't have to) and i can take up any classes as long as my payrolls allow. and i've decided to take up BALLET! i want to tinkle my toes with my cute lil tutu. and i've found someone whose also interested! Valerie! we'll be taking classes together. i think everyone should pursue whatever that one's feel like doing. cos u wouldnt wan to die as an regretful old lady.

I"M TAKING UP BALLET !!!

i'm gonna dance as though no one is watching me!!!

i'm just so excited!!!

Dance as though no one is watching you.

Love as though you have never been hurt before.

Sing as though no one can hear you.

Live as though heaven is on earth.

-Souza-

i think i'm mutating. MISSie ROBOTie.

2007-03-21T21:18:00.000+08:00

i think i'm mutating. today was the dateline for my SM project. had so much to complete yesterday. i knew i had to finish before i go to bed. and so i did... completeing report, re-read, edit, re-edit, formate, formate, re-edit. the whole process is so tedious.

3.30am -> mummy woke up to ask me to sleep early... (it's already early enough) ~~tomorrow~~ that morning i have to attend school at 930 am.
4am -> dammed! i havent formate my project and tt useless executive summery
4.30am-> hmm... why didn't i feel tired at all?
5am-> ok i'm done formating... maybe i should read through again to reaffirm...
5.30am-> after 4 times of reading enough! BEDTIME!
5.45am-> ehhh.... why can't i fall asleep? ~SLEPT~
7.30am-> better to wake up to go through the project again... and print it. *reminded myself: school at 930am (must be on time!)*
8am-> bathed and changed. breakfast with my labby. (read through AGAIN!)
830am-> print (look through again)
9am-> reprint (look though again)
915am-> reprint (DAMMED! i'm late!)
930am-> searching for my notes (still cant find it, my table has piles n piles of paper)
945am-> decided to go for afternoon lesson
1000am-> search for all the library books tt i've borrowed. 3 books from Ngee Ann, 9 books from SIM= 12 books (-.-)
1030am-> ask mummy to help me with the books to the car (voom...)

i'm not too sure if it is my tired mind that caused me to do so many overlapping tasks. but it is wierd that everytime i re-read my report i would have something to improve on. (haizzz...) i slept for about 2 hours. and till now. 1212am i dont feel tired at all. (huh?) studying for GM test. my dumbie busy schdule. DON'T understand how the schdule was planned! maybe i should go on studying till 3am today. (if i dont fall asleep on my table) i'm mutating into a mechanic ROBOTie. after i finish this rough period. i'm going to tear the whole sky down!!!! AND HAVE FUN!!!

i just HAVE to... COMPLAIN!!!!!

2007-03-17T01:54:00.000+08:00

these day i've been having a very rough time. work is piling up till i can't breath. this is really unbelievable. no matter how much i try to clear my work, it just keep coming. at this point i really think i can breath properly. imaging having this schdule:

19/03-> finish global marketing ppt (i havent even started the report?)
21/03-> strategic managment 4000 words report due (i'm less than halfway there...)
22/03-> global marketing ppt trial
23/03-> global marketing ppt presentation
23/03-> global marketing test (YES! it's bloodly on the same day)
27/03-> managing change test (it's a dumb case analysis, no idea wad it is abt!)
29/03-> finish global marketing report and edit the whole report
01/04-> finish WIL2 report and edit the whole report
05/04-> global marketing report due
09/04-> WIL2 report due

what the hell is that?! i've yet felt this "shitty" just as i thought life was bad enough. more n more just come my way. after i graduate i would be totally impressed with my friends and myself being able to take this kinda shit and didn't bang my head agaist the wall! this is really very fustrating!!! it is the kind of feeling where u know ur brain juice is dead! dont even know if my brain is thinking straight anyways. been a week since i slept be4 2am. mug mug mug. tt's wad's my life now. go to school attend lessons listen to the lecturer crapping i donno wad. go to the library grab more books to read. donno wad the author is talking, sleep on it while driving home. get home and try to crap about those nonsense looking theories. try to think of something logically till 3 am till my eyes cant open even if i try to pry it oopen. go to sleep. and the cycle goes on and on and on... and i just got to know that ** had made my life so much more miserable though it is a great organization. AURGH!!!!

!#$%^&*!#$%^&*&^%$#!!##$%$%^

tt just explain why kids nowadays are always childhood deprive. cos edcuation rob us of it!!! tt's bloodly unfair!!! girls no longer got time to comb the hair of Barbie dolls. boys no longer have time to catch spiders. maybe adults would stop saying tt kids nowadays dont understand this dont understand tt. tt's because they didn't give us time to understand or know. THE??!!!

~ph0t0s~

2007-03-14T00:40:00.000+08:00

i have to get myself motivated to finish my project. i keep slacking off to watch the VV Drama. grr... just cleared my phone of all the pictures. so... hehe....

My black and white Kimono top. very pretty! cos.. it's satin! i just got something for satin. that luxious feel.

my new handphone ding dong. his name is "ta ta" so cutie... living in an ice cube. hee...

10 tulips for the anniversary.

it must have been the projects... my dark eye ring... tt's my birthday flowers. 22 pink roses.

Kev said the 22 pink roses wasn't pretty so... tt's another 8 red roses for Valentines. tt's so many flowers for the 2 months. 10+ 22+8= 40 stalks? (-.-) i made this for Lingz for a birthday. a bag charm.
took that during the gathering just now. hehe. so nice! my youngest cousins. Tessa(left) and Tiffany (right) and of course tt's me in the center.

~END~

a lil update...

2007-03-10T23:13:00.000+08:00

my stuffs are stacking up again. not only my school work but also my shopping bags. got no place to put. this month is a "i'm so broke month" march has always been a nightmare. cos everyone's birthday is in march. HuiLing, Wen Jun, Kevin.... blah blah blah. how can i not be broke. luckily i got much planned out. ordered from Old Navy a couple of months back for all the prezzies. except Junz. that Tai Tai. so hard to get something for her. i mean of course it would be easy if i have a boot load of cash. too bad i dont. but her prezzie cost me one of my wheels though. -_-

and i have decided that... next year... both of them (Ling and Jun) would get something that didn't request and not want it, or not in any use.(especially Ling) god have been too kind too them and too mean to me. i need to sew my pocket back in place.

i've got a new pet. it's my Tamagotchi. dug it out from my drawer. i wanted some distraction other than my work. there's was one day tt i totaly forgot abt her. and didn't feed her. and she died. but it's alright a click of a button, i got another pet. it is 6 years old now. and she's really happy! =) i guess i just bored. but it's alright.

here. i'm gonna share my fav cantonese song
1st on list... Sammi Cheng: Ni Ai Wo Ai Bu Qi

Next is Eason Chan- K Ge Zi Wang. i dont have the same feeling when i listen to the chinese version. to say they change the whole lyrics that it doesn't make sense anymore. -_- the cantonese version is the original version and it is freaking nice!

Lastly... this is a very new song by Gigi Leong- Gai Ji Zi De Qing Ge.

anyways. tt day we went to celebrate Ling bday we went to sing K. and i guess the peeps was quite shock that i can sing Cantonese songs. i sang the Sammi Cheng song. i used to go Hong Kong at least 4-5 times a year when my dad was doing business here. so somehow... i picked it up.

Grrrr.....

2007-03-07T18:36:00.000+08:00

LIFE IS GETTING MORE AND MORE SCREWED! DAMMIT!!!!

tu amor

2007-02-27T21:25:00.000+08:00

alright... i'm doing my projectS now... but just wanna say something. been looking for this song and everyone thinks that i'm one dumb wierdo trying to look for this strange song. but it is nice! and so i got so determined to find this song. and here's the mv. the mv is a lil off but... the song is nice. now it is on my repeat mode! hehe.... enjoy ppl!

Tu Amor

Mi Amor I'm Not sure of the right words to say
Maybe these simple words will do best to best explain
What I Feel in my heart,What i feel more each day,Oh
How to make u see how to let u know,how to say how I love u so
With word u understand,Words that get right through to your heart
Here's a place to start
Chorus:
Tu Amor, I will always be
Tu amor, means the world to me
Estera Siempre En Mi Corazon
You're the one in my soul
And I live for Tu Amor,Tu Amor
Mi Amor love u more
With each look in your eyes
Maybe these simple word
Will do best to best decribe
What I feel in my heart
What I feel for all time
How to make u see
How to let u know
How to say how I need u so
With words u understand
Words that get straight through to your soul
Word that let u know
Chorus:
Tu Amor, I will always be
Tu amor, means the world to me
Estera Siempre En Mi Corazon
You're the one in my soul
And I live for Tu Amor,Tu Amor
You're the one that i need in my arms
Beleive me these words I say are
Words that come straight from the heart
How do i make u beleive nothing else
Means as much as what u mean to me
*~Speaking*~
Chorus:
Tu Amor, I will always be
Tu amor, means the world to me
Estera Siempre En Mi Corazon
You're the one in my soul
And I live for Tu Amor,Tu Amor

ok... this song is way back from 1997 sung by this guy called Jon B in an album called Cool Relax and now re-sung by RBD. hehe. one of my sweetie love songs... =)

more baggies!

2007-02-11T00:35:00.000+08:00

happie birthday to ME! happie birthday to ME!!! been wanting to sing this song to... MYSELF for a long time. so... for the past 2 days i kept singing this song to myself in front of Kev. but he forbids it, cos he said it isn't my birthday yet.

one thing i really dont understand... why do ppl only celebrate their birth only on the actual day? does it mean on the other days... we dont have to be thankful that we are where we are now? we dont have to be thankful that we have the people around us? maybe it's just an excuse for marketers to earn more money... haha. probably right. anyways that mean i get to have prezzies anyways.

today went shopping with Kev. wanted to get my Nine West heels and bag. but the heels... dont have my size. and the bag... OOS (out of stock) huh?! -_- i guess it's just my luck... love that heels so gorgous! so glitz. =( upset. and since the bad i aimed for is gone... i saw another one tt i like. mhahaha!!! it also another kiss-lock bag. purple with black lace. so pretty!!! but didn't buy. not sure at this moment did i regret. oh nvm... CAUSE....!!! i GOT TWO NEW BAGS ANYWAYS! hehe. *EVIL GRIN* some PENSIVE new baggy... you'll get what i mean....

Blue Crumpler. ok... i didn't buy this. Kev bought for me, cos he rememeber.... once upon a time... i said i like it and i want to buy it. and even though i got it off my wishlist, somehow he still rememebered. probably b'cos he wanted to get one when he was in aussie. ok la... i share my prezzie he bought for me with him. haha. sounds wierd? NVM, as long as i'm alright with it

NEXT UP....

GAP HOBO Rhinestone trench bag. been wanting to get a GAP trench bag for a long long time. and thus... i got this to pamper myself. and it has a high re-sell value. *giggles* this is super girlie, just the opposite of the crumple. two extreme end. just look at the *bling bling* rhinestone at the bucker. and the satin just screams PENSIVE!!! this is so fun. and it is becoming addictive!!! hehe. and recently realized i bought so many pink stuff. a tee, a skirt, eye-shadow... and now a bag. been really pinky these days.

more bags added to my collections. AND MORE TO COME. more welcome. *WOOT* love it. best of all give me cash! *CHI KING* hehe. another reminder... no plush. no plush toys. enough. Bobby has enough friends already.

p/s: should i get the nine west baggie? kiss- lock(so cute)... purple(mt fav colour)... lace (so pretty)... huh? KIV (keep in view)

thanks dar for the crumpler love it! =)

i'm wearing a ZaraKids 8-11 yrs old tee...

2007-02-06T00:20:00.000+08:00

yeah! finally got time to do some updates! new year is coming and something's more exciting! that's my Birthday!!! (just so that everyone knows... hehe.) i just love growing up wiser! =P recently having been to the stores for a long long time. i guesss the addiction is getting from bad to worst. BUT! there have been a slow down in the purchasing i swear! as u can see i dont wear new clothes everyday already. just the other i was at Zara and didn't see anything i like, was quite upset. so i headed into ZaraKids and saw this SUPER cute baby pink tee. got this lil ribbon on the shoulders. so i took out the largest sizing thinking that i could wear it. so it is the 12-14 years old. (or something like tt) and after i tried it on... it was TOO BIG?! -_- (yes, i didn't type wrongly "IT IS TOO BIG") then i bought the 9-11 years old tee. can u believe i'm wearing a tee that is for kids 9-11 years old??!! 2 possibility!

1) i'm to skinny that i can fit into a 6-11 years old tee
2) the sizing is crazy that the tee can fit a LADY tt's turning 22.

well... i mean it's good. i got the tee i like. at a lower price than normal Zara tee. and it look EFFING CUTE!!! thinking... maybe next time i should just shop at GAPKids, ZaraKids etc. and save more $$$. so now... GAP.com & WalMart.com kids department here i come.so delighted!!! i've also recently tried pepper lunch. wow! it taste really delicious one of the nicer fast food, other than Carls Jr of course. but i think after Carls Jr, Pepper Lunch is next on my fav list. super nice. you guys should try it if u haven't but the price is about that of Carls Jr. $10+++

Prezzies are coming my way shall put up my wishlist soon. hehe.

1st on the list: a NEW BAG! i want a new GUESS bag!! tt's a bag big not too big, just enough for school. i also saw this Nine West bag at Wisma. with the pretty claps. SO NICE!!! so wanna get it. =( dont be shock by the brand i think it's on 50% discount! thinking if i should get it! IT REALLY VERY nice!!! well... i can work well with more bag. like junz always says a girl will never have enough bags! and i agreee!!! how abt Agnes B tote, or a polo tote? nice nice!
2nd on the list: this pokie heels from NINE WEST too!!! it is blue with off-white pokie dotties!!! arugh super cute. but donno why loooking at the heels keep reminding me of Ning... maybe i think of Ning too often...
3rd on the list: to be continued...

BUT pls no matter what get me NO MORE SOFT TOYS, no more! after i put the live size SpongBob Barry bought for me for Christmas i have barely space for myself! even some of the toys are on the floor. but Bobby is really very CUTE!!! will post up Bobby's photo soon.

again trying to fall asleep

2007-01-14T16:32:00.000+08:00

recently i've been having difficulties falling asleep. i would toss and turn in my bed for a few hours before i could drift to sleep. and normally at that time it would be at least 2-3 in the morning. and would have been waken up by 11am. i was sick since thursday night when i got home from school.

really dont know what's going on with me. -_-

and during those nights... i would think about so many things. about the people around me who are so dear to me. i asked myself if i sometimes do take them for granted. and the answer i gave myself... most of the time. i found myself unable to express myself well enough to them and to let them know how much i care or treasure them. since Kev is back i found myself a lil off- course. a lil lost in fact. i've no idea what i should do in the times ahead. and even think that i wouldn't score as well as i did the last sem. and i somehow know he feel the same way. probably. it's not that feelings have changed or anything, just that this is maybe the time where u feel helpless and need some advice. there're things that i didn't say but it doesn't mean that i didn't feel it or didn't understand. my feelings is the same, wanting to hold on to it so tightly that i didn't take a step backwards to see the whole situation more clearly. the nights have been cold and lonely, both of us felt it...

as for my friends. i'll fulfill what i've promised. i didn't forget just that i put it aside for this moment.

my sleepless night

2007-01-04T02:32:00.000+08:00

i guess tonight would be another sleepless night. these few days i havent been having my beautiful dreams nor any nightmares. for me personally i love dreams. everyone knows that there are things that you can't do in reality and it is the dreams that makes everything comes alive. it's in the dreams that u can do whatever that u can ever think of. it's in the dreams that u can have everything to go ur way. and it's only in the dreams that u and the ppl around u can be all so perfect...

i've read so many books about dreams, knowing how true it is. and how to interprete from the dreams that i have. and maybe it is through all these dreams that u know how u really feel. oh well... at least mine does.

i remembered there was one night i dreamt of both a bursting flame and flood in the same night.

Bursting flames-anything that suggests a controlling force giving way before fierce energies from within can be a potent image of anger or fustration contained beyond the point of self- control.

flood- may represent the dream's fustration, and suggest the need to find an alternative route. in this way, the dreamer is reminded that there is often more than one way to deal with fustrations.

and i kept thinking what i should do now. what are the other alternative ways can i deal with my own fustration? sometimes u just get so tired that u no longer wan to look what's ahead of u or even move on to see.

i've read so many books. love, ghost, trillers, self- actualization, so many... and since i was young i thought that fairytales are the most beautiful stories on earth. and thus have kept one of my favourite book of the Complete Fairy Tales by the Brothers Grimm. to me... every single fairy tale are so complete. the Brothers Grimm are the guys who wrote us Cinderella, Rapunzel, Hansel & Gretel, Snow White... i grew up reading those stories a million times and again. so much so that i had made up my own fairy tale.

And it is till now that i realized that my fairy tale ain't wanted at all! and i'm on the verge of tearing my book and my own fairy tale apart! and i did... i tore the tale abt Cinderella out. tearing it out from the book and from my memories!

Liang Shan Bo Yu Zhu Li Ye

2007-01-04T00:44:00.000+08:00

Cao Ge and ZhuoWenXuan

Liang Shan Bo Yu Zhu Li Ye

very nice song...

who is ur ideal lover?

2007-01-04T00:37:00.000+08:00

to be able to be ur ideal lover i dont know what i need or should do.

i want to how is your ideal lover in your heart?
will i be qualified to be your ideal lover?
I really wanna know what kind of girls can get your perfect marks.

and maybe till then i wouldn't feel unconfident. maybe this is just a purr of moment. maybe it is pms. there's so many many MAYBEs. i hope this wouldn't cause me to hold on to things so much tighter until it is so suffocating

i'm just fustrated with myself

2007-01-02T23:06:00.000+08:00

Shouldn't the start of the year be a happy a joyous? And yet I'm sitting here brooding over something that I don't even know if it exists.

I found her blog address on his computer, I didn't mean to invoke his privacy. I was just bored surfing around on his computer. I don't know what the hell I'm so upset about. I totally feel so dumb getting upset over what's written in the history? Am I angry over his concern? Or is it her persistence over him? Or what is written of him? I myself want to know. She already has a boyfriend and there and then he would talk about him missing the times with him. If I knew this is coming, I would have prayed so hard that I didn't see it at all.

I asked myself if how I feel for him isn't as strong as what she feels for him. It seems as if she knew so much about him and yet I’m not too sure what are his likings and dislikes. Or even what he is allergic to. And yes I'm a failure if u must say. Even they way they talk are similar and their lifestyle. Maybe it is true that when u're with a person gradually you will grow to be like the person. To say we have different lifestyles. Today is the 2nd just 3 more days it's gonna be a year. And yet we are so apart. It is as if we had just been together. Is that good? Cause it is fresh? Or is it bad? Cause it's so hard to capture.

And to say... she knows about me... because I'm that BLOODY KIDDY RICH BABE.

I'M REALLY FUSTRATED. Not with anyone but myself.

my achievement

2006-12-16T11:30:00.000+08:00

"i am totally impressed with you well- resourced and well- written essay. It was also very well presented. you have chosen a very huge organization like Unilever with very social structures and yet you have effortlessly presented its corporate governance practices so insightfully and so in-dept. all you observations and recommendations for Unilever to improve upon its corporate governance code practices were relevant, appropriate and well- thought out! Congratulations on your excellent effort!"

- comments written by the marker of my Corporate Governance individual project

this is the moment that i wish i could just stand still and not move on. i enjoy it. well... at least my hard work paid off. and i'm happy. i may not need the recognition of others. All I needed is the believe in myself that I can do it again.

Anyways… I got HD for this project.

YUMMY! Dinner

2006-12-14T22:30:00.000+08:00

This is one of the most interesting dinner i had in Vietnam. it is in a french fine dining resturant. all the food looks... very nice and taste super!!!

this suppose to be some appertizer. but has a rooster lited- up in the stomach. and it is made up of pineapple and some carrot?! nice eh?!

A dragon shaped fried rice?

cooked Pheniox! neh! just some nice looking pork. wad a fortunate piggy that look so nice. hehe.

ok... i'll say the not so pretty dish of that night. but it taste GREAT! the soup is heaven!!!
can u see the lil penguin at the left corner of the picture? it is actually trying to fish that huge fried fish. haha. so cute!!!

now... i'm just trying to be funny! wanting the penguin to fish my soup. =)
Lastly! the dessert! another dragon. i should i say... dragon boat. hehe.

Nice dinner eh?!

Pictures

2006-12-14T22:07:00.000+08:00

the boat trip heaing to the Mekong River. the water is really gross!

when i'm in the Cu Chi Tunnel. it's so small i can't even stand properly. and it is so effing dark inside... -_-
just look at the entrance. donesn't it look more like a rat hole? hehe. but it was a cool experience... =)
on the streets at Vitnam walking to the the Notre Dame Cathedral...at Vung Tau Beach, so calming... ah.... this is the true beach that leads directly to the South China Sea. This is what i call the open sea... not the Sentosa kind... -_-
while having dinner on the ship. just slip off to the deck for a picture. hehe

that's at the entrance of the restaurant of that boat... ok... ship...

my trip to Vietnam

2006-12-10T23:25:00.000+08:00

re-hi...

finally i'm back. yup. back from my holiday at Vietnam. it's just so tiring... my whole body is aching so badly... oh well... at least i got to some historical site. and experinced to climb through the CuChi tunnel that the Vietnamese have intelligently built during the war- times. i'm totally amazed how they live in the tunnel. the oxygen is so minimal. i thought i was going to die there. and it is like what i've wrote in my previous entry. it's so dark. where u can neither move ahead or backwards. the tunnel is so small that u need to squate and walk, more like a duck waddling.

then i tried their "sampan" the river is so small and 3 lil sampans try to flow through it at the same time swaying from side to side. knocking and banging into each other. haiz. how can i ever live in that kind of life. it is a total terror for me.

then the third shocking place i went is at the coast of Vietnam, where it was hit by a typhoon 3 days before i went there. i saw how the people lived in a house without a roof. trees being uprooted and laid acrossed the road. the worst of all the electric cables danging in mid-air and the whole city did not have electricity. i really left so upset seeing all these. and convince myself that the mental torturement is nothing compared to theirs... will upload the pictures soon... =(

p/s: the shopping ain't that great!

In the Subway...

2006-11-26T01:17:00.000+08:00

Walking in a subway where only the lights around me were lit. Beyond the standing radius was pitch dark. I walked along the subway line, hoping that I would reach the other station. But as I walk the light behind me got further and further away and ahead of me is an endless darkness, a darkness where I would not know when it would end. Soon, even the light behind me disappeared. The darkness overwhelmed me straight into my heart. I felt that bitterness and chill within me. I’m afraid to continue to walk and yet I do not want to turn back. In fact, I don’t even know if I could turn back. All around me was left with nothing but darkness. I’m not sure if I should walk further into the darkness. In anyways which way is which? Somehow I got lost. I no longer know which direction I’m heading to. And even suspect if i made the right choice.

My Praise

2006-11-20T00:59:00.000+08:00

Thing are just getting out of hand. i think the more i stay at home the more i spend. wondering who invented the internet, and most of all internet shopping. greatful yet irritated! ARUGH!!! alright i havent been updating my blog for the longest time. i think i'm just plain lazy.

Since the end of the exams i felt so much better. i felt that sense of relieve BUT i'm so worried about my results. Especially Finance! that paper is such a terror! i thought i was going to die. i mean i already died once already. the Finance paper is the ultimate killer! this is the worst paper ever since my A Maths paper. that's hell of a long time ago. i remember my that A Maths paper. i scored only 23 marks! (and of cos that is over a 100%) i'm really in dead shit! i mean... if they do not have a moderation on the paper. i'm bound to fail the exam! it's as if i know NUTS about the paper. so what i got a high distiction for my test?! tt's only a BLOODY 30% now i could only pray they would do a moderation at the rate tt i'll pass. to say, a finance paper that's full of calculations and they ain't marking the workings BUT only the answers is UTTERLY STUPID! i swear if i FAIL i'm GOnna CURSE and SWEAR at them till they can't see the daylight! i'm so agitated and just feel like killing them!!!

Other than that paper. they rest are rather smooth sailing. i gonna bid goodbye to my Degree in Distinction for now. *UPSET* and here comes the hoilday... boring time. time to make some money. my online biz has been doing quite well. for those who dont know... (the site is at www.you-niquely.blogspot.com) earning some good money. got back my 1st round of capital already and pumped in even more to get some nice pretty charms. just yesterday i just bought some 50+ charms from the States (online of cos!) and i'm very optimistic about it. i bought some gingerbread girl and boy, candy canes, ballerina, angels etc etc etc. and another good news for my online biz... i'm bring in clothes to sell from Korea, Hong Kong and Taiwan. and the 1st batch of clothes are absolutely great. Especially the TRENCH dress!!! cool!!!

i am proud of myself in a certain way. i hope to put all of these in place as an additional income for me: the high maintainance girl. to say i'm living off myself. not my parents nor boyfriend. ya! SO WHERE DO U THINK THE MONEY COME FROM? and just 2 days ago my elder sister is bugging me to make accessories for her to sell? i mean... wouldn't i be competing with myself? will think about it. NOT! haha.

this is the newest necklace. AND it's so ME!!! the feather, rhinestones and the butterfly!!! SWEET! and guess wad? it's sold! tt's make me a happy girl!!!

recently got hold of these site that have great great shoes!!! and of cos i bought a pair. LUCKILY it's just A pair... hehe

i just think the red and black goes so well with the scallope lace. a little like mary-jane shoes not yet not. i think this is my dream pair of shoes cos it has a 5cm heels. (not too tall) love it! wad's more it cost... less than $20 SGD. haha. now i got another pair of heels that i can run, jump, hop in it. (i just can't stay still)

recently at home i found many many good deals and sites to make my spree, and this is a point where when i go out to shop in shop-fronts, things would appear expensive to me. cos i know i would be able to get it online at a fraction of the price, and yet i enjoy the shop- front spree better. and now it would no longer be a suprise that i would head out for a day of shopping and yet... not buy anything at all. (i think Huiling and Junz would be shock to hear this phrase from me) anyways here r one of the stuff... will upload more tomorrow. =) so tired. time for bed... *YAWN*

ps: Kevin is coming back on the 25th of this month. and it would be... for GOOD. finally... after the long wait. at least then MAYBE i would have a finiancial officer controling my shopping. or maybe i would overrule his... i mean just MAYBE... and i better not. still want to be that independent girl.

some new items this month

2006-10-18T01:44:00.000+08:00

My Angel (Customization for Kev's friend)

Old Navy Denim Embroided Skirt.

Victorias Secret Corset Blouse (FOR SALES)

Abercrombie and Fitch Rhinestone Rabbit Fur Cardigan

Below are the 3 newly imporated Korea dresses... (FOR SALES)

i see too much...

2006-10-18T01:33:00.000+08:00

there are things that people would hope that they didn't hear or didn't see. cos they hope they can be ignorant, and not know the truth so that they can live life as it is and not be upset. i think i'm one of those people. i'm used to always saying everything is alright. and take things at my own stride, but probably that's not me. maybe i'm wrong. now i wished i'm the one that is totally ignorant. and wished i didn't have the instinct and intelligence i've always asked for. and be that "innocent" lil lamb that roam around the vast green land and be happy. to say... life ain't that simple. even a lamb would get hunted by a wolf. anytime.

for this moment i know i shouldn't have any more expectations. and just live life as it is. and there can only be 2 routes.
1: continue to roam around till the day i'll learn the ruthless truth to reality and accept it
2: get eaten by the wolf and free myself from worries.

how much choices do a person have? it's only those... i'm just dumb and deaf now. i really need to get myself back to studying. i've just wasted 2 days. *sign* just one more week to my 1st paper. only 'i' can save 'me'

tonight i wanna cry...

2006-10-16T22:17:00.000+08:00

Alone in this house again tonight

I got the TV on, the sound turned down and a bottle of wine

There's pictures of you and I on the walls around me

The way that it was and could have been surrounds me

I'll never get over you walkin' away

I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show

And I thought that bein' strong meant never losin' your self-control

But I'm just drunk enough to let got of my pain

To hell with my pride, let it fall like rain

From my eyes

Tonight I wanna cry

Would it help if I turned a sad song on

"All By Myself" would sure hit me hard now that you're gone

Or maybe unfold some old yellow lost love letters

It's gonna hurt bad before it gets better

But I'll never get over you by hidin' this way

where should i head to...?

2006-10-16T22:08:00.000+08:00

things have really changed so much these days. the days where everything lies clam and serene are gone. and what lies ahead is a treacherous road. All I wish for is for it to pass quickly. Or at least show me what I have done all these months is right. Show me that I haven’t made the wrong choice. I’ve always thought I’m able to cope with it. The distance. The cold. The fear. I guess my fear had never left me. It‘s just hidden somewhere within me, where I have always refused to acknowledge. If I had hidden it then why do you want me to find it again? At this moment wish I could forget. U made me lose myself.

bags... depression...

2006-09-24T00:23:00.000+08:00

i'm not feel not that well. a little nutty these days. yeah... i'm a lil upset. depression sets in. haiz. need some comments. which bag should i choose. both are from NYC Loop. one of my favourite bag brand. one have some pretty flowers and butterflies.

look at the pretty embroided flowers. and the polka dots. and the pleated shoulder strap.

TinkleBell look so pretty. with all the glittery stars and diamante. *Glitz*

for me... i like the 1st one more. i hope by the time save up the bag is still available for sales, and not 'SOLD OUT' should i buy... anyone willing to sponsor for the sake of my 'high distiction' haiz... talking rubbish again. *sigh sigh sigh*

Re-enactment and today's happenings

2006-09-21T21:26:00.000+08:00

Re-enactment
Saturday- 16 Sept 2006
just sitting down on the chair just made me feel so cold. i dont know how the paper will turn out to be. will i be able to answer the questions? or would the questions just be too hard for me to answer. is the effort i've put in enough? what if i wasn't able to score well? to say the truth i'm really scared about the finance test, i'm just pray i would be able to answer the questions and at least hit a distiction.

as i was doing the paper, my head hurts. i could as if hear my brain telling me i'm to exhasted and need a good rest. i tried to look at the clock at the front of the hall. my vision went totally blurred. the clock seems to be spinning. and i guess i should just look down and stare at my paper. from time to time my mind went blank for that spilt seconds. this paper is 30%. i would need all i have to complete this paper no matter what.

walking out of the hall. arugh!!! i can feel that my brain is totally exhasted. and after talking to Ling, i realized i have one dumb dumb mistake. OMG OMG!!! i thought i was going to die. the fault lies in a 'WORD' i misinterpretated that BLOODY fugging word. now i'm sure i'm dead. on the way driving home, i could feel myself about to doze off. and i need to head home asap to complete my DC project. there's still so much gray areas for me to cover.

Today's Happenings

i've been editing my part for the DC projust umpteen times. i dont know what is right or wrong anymore. now. all i care is that i SHOULD make the report looks as if alot of effort is put into it. and even if the calculations are wrong. i could have some pity marks. i edit my part almost every nigght when i reach home. apologies to my group members. but i'm really very unsure about this project. it is like... asking me to find. the income level of mid-high level income people who would passby Specialists' Center. that is 3 different questions of cross-tabulation. if the report's result would to turn out badly due to my part, i really feel the sense of regret. on a second thought, the teacher would probably not realize my mistake. this perception came about when we were discussing our tutorial in class, and he gave the WRONG ANSWERS to the questions. (do take note of the word 'ANSWERS' with the 'S' behind) this isn't happening. this is bad! is he teaching ur the wrong things anyway? i really do wonder...

my group and me started preparations for our presentation since 9 am in the morning. and it only got to our turn till 130 after out lunch break. we rehearse so many times to ensure we do not exceed the time limit. started repsentation at 1.37pm sharp. and for 20 min. amazingly after 10 min the teacher started banging the table to say it's the last one min? and we are only at our 3rd speaker out of 6th? what was that bang for? 10 mins mark? then he started to bang more and more frequently and insisted time of 20 mins was up. BUT it was barely 15min! we had to cut short our presentation. then he told us we started at 1.27pm thus would end at1.47pm! we were totally shocked. and i swear upon god, and having someone else to vouch for us, in order for him to believe us?! and said very generously "anyway... you guys have excceeded by 5 min, but i guess i wouldnt penalize you." u disclaimed our time, and rush us through our presentation. ** angry **

reach home around 3 + after getting some supplies for my craftwork. manage to get a nap (finally!!!) and decided to turn on my computer again to go my EG project. into the student portal. the finance test result is out!!! OMG! this time is really really fast!!! so scary!!! Distinction. pls Distinction. pls appear in front of me! pls pls!!!

HIGH DISTINCTION!!! oh yeah!!! one step nearer to my initial goal! pls come my way. fill my path with u... my lovely. my beloved. high distinction. finance test- high distinction. Target achieved! effort paid off! *phew*

now... i feel even more motivated to work harder! =)

negligence

2006-09-19T00:43:00.000+08:00

I don’t know I’m I being negligence. But I feel that my term has been wasted
so fast. Before I realized, it’s soon the end of the term already. And I still
have 2 project s, 1 presentation, 1 test and 4 exams to complete. Just you think
I’m getting freer. It’s just the start of me getting busier. Now, I’m attending
a 5 days week, including Saturday. And a stack of work to complete. I think I’m
going nuts soon. To say… life ain’t easy here. Life is a piece of crap. Serious!
There’s so much I wanna say but… ain’t got enough time. I’ve lesson at 930 in
the morning, hopefully I reach school early enough to get my library book. And
afternoon, project meeting. Then head home for more projects.

To cut everything short and sweet, today I went down to look for my O3 Kenneth
aka ‘One and Only One’ aka Mr. Bashful. Oh well… hasn’t seen him for donkey
years. I’m glad that he’s doing rather well now. Do miss working with him. All
his joke. And of course NO stress from all the projects. Got a pair of Nokia
starlight cinema tix, my favourite Keane ‘Under the Iron Sea’ CD and Keane
‘Strangers’ Dual DVD!!!! Haha. What a whoop!!! It’s all FREE!!! See I told you
he’s my O3! For today I’ve been listening to the CD the whole day. My favourite
track. Track No. 8! Crystal Ball!!! “Replay! Replay! Replay! AND MORE
REPLAY!!!!”

Mhahaa…. I guess that is the only thing that had made my day!!! YEAH!!! But I
guess someone is a lil jealous about me meeting my O3… you know who I am talking
about right….? -> Kev <- right? Oh well u know who…. <- heehee *devilish smile*

My PaLaCe

Sentosa

Hong Kong

Welcome to Taiwan!!!

Arab Street

Portsdown Road

Redang Part 2

Redang part 1

Underwater photos in Redang

Barry's birthday

Love story...

Smoking

Leaf's departure is because of Wind's pursuit. Or because Tree didn'task her to stay...

expectations...

最近

bikini!

ending of one route and the start of another...

determined

if i had a chance

i'm no longer HIS lil bunny...

Dao Dai

confused.

2 different world

Pictures

My Mummy!!!

once upon a time

the bimbo talk- love or hate? can't make up my mind...

it's my fault

i want to learn Ballet

i think i'm mutating. MISSie ROBOTie.

i just HAVE to... COMPLAIN!!!!!

~ph0t0s~

a lil update...

Grrrr.....

tu amor

more baggies!

i'm wearing a ZaraKids 8-11 yrs old tee...

again trying to fall asleep

my sleepless night

Liang Shan Bo Yu Zhu Li Ye

who is ur ideal lover?

i'm just fustrated with myself

my achievement

YUMMY! Dinner

Pictures

my trip to Vietnam

In the Subway...

My Praise

some new items this month

i see too much...

tonight i wanna cry...

where should i head to...?

bags... depression...

Re-enactment and today's happenings

negligence